Mixed Blessing? written September 18, 2011

"What cancer does is, it forces you to focus, to prioritize, and you learn what's important. I mean, I don't sweat the small stuff.” ~ quoted by Gilda Radner

It certainly does change one's outlook on what is really important. I know that it took this dread disease to make me closer to God. I had accepted Christ as my Savior when I was 13, but it took this trauma to knock some sense into me. I now talk more freely about God's love for us, and what Jesus did on the cross for us.

Now I enjoy everyday things, little things, a lot more. I always have been a nature lover, a free-spirit of sorts, but now I sense everything more clearly, like I have a sixth sense...not just "see" the birds and butterflies or "smell" the flowers, but really know that God created them for us to enjoy. I see their vivid colors more clearly. I watch the little creatures more closely in my yard, and not just the birds in the birdbath, but the squirrels, rabbits,

and chipmunks. I know that they also need water, and provide it for them during this drought. In the past I would have been upset if I saw a rabbit eating away at one of my plants...now I just plant more and let him eat away to his heart's content. Plants can always be replaced! But the joyous memory of watching a little rabbit munch away on the tall grasses cannot be replaced. Now I capture the little guy on my camera instead of getting upset with him!

Another mixed blessing...I met my husband, Brian, shortly after I had a pulmonectomy for a malignant pulmonary carcinoid tumor on April 10, 2008. I had pretty much given up hope of ever finding a "decent, nice guy". I had prayed about it for quite some time, and just figured it'd never happen. But God had other plans...so on May 21, 2008, with all my thanks going to mutual friends for introducing us, Chuck and Pam, and of course to God, I met my husband to be on a blind date. He was certainly worth waiting for! We got married September 5, 2009 and we are like two peas in a pod, and just being together, doing nothing, is fun with him! Now don't get me wrong, we have had our ups and downs, and we will have them in the future, but we use our senses of humor to get through it!

I'm rambling, which seems at times to be the trait that I am best at, but there is a moral of this story: Don't give up...there is always a silver lining in those gray clouds...the sun is up there shining even on a cloudy day...and if you don't know Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, find out how, and get to know Him.

" For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this is not from yourselves, it is the Gift of God."~~~Ephesians 2:8 NIV