Two people's lives

There are times when only a Mom's love can understand our tears, soothe our disappointments, and calm our fears. There are times when only her love can share the joy we feel when something we have dreamed about suddenly is real. There are times when only her faith can help us in life and inspire in us the confidence we need every day. For a Mom's heart, her faith, and her love were sent from God.

Since my mom's passing, I've been trying to help my siblings clean her house to get it ready to sell yet this spring. Last Friday, as I was lovingly folding Mom's clothes, I took the time to hug some of them and tightly clutch them to my face to try to smell her scent, but I was disappointed, as the only scent I smelled was of sickening fabric softener. If I had gotten a whiff of her scent or her perfume, I would have burst into tears. Each piece of clothing that I folded held so many memories. I fondly remembered when she had wore that certain blouse or dress, or remembered the photograph that she had wore it in. I took a couple of her blouses home that are my favorites for a keepsake and as a remembrance of her.

Anything at all that holds a special memory for me, I took home as a remembrance. To name a few,  her chicken figurines, a couple of vintage bowls, odds and ends of pretty glassware.....the gifts that I had given her over the years. Things that have no monetary value at all, but mean the world to me.

Each time I go to Mom's house it gets more difficult. Yesterday in particular was hard and emotional for me.

I walked into the garage and saw all the black bags full of items to be disposed of, along with all the memories that they hold being disposed of too. The very same things that Mom and Dad had held onto for so many, many years. These things were their life, their treasures, things they wouldn't let go. To Mom and Dad their things were worth so much and they would never dream of ever throwing any of it away. Now a lot of their precious things are being sold, given away, or bagged up and thrown away. This makes me feel so terribly sad. Two people's lives.

I sat alone on the floor in that back bedroom that Mom and Dad used for storage. Over the many years together, they had accumulated so many wonderful gifts from loved ones that had eventually overflowed into this little room. I sat and looked through stacks of greeting cards that Mom and Dad had received over the years from their children, grandchildren and other loved ones, some of whom have also passed from their earthly homes....from birthday, anniversary, Valentine's Day, Mother's Day to Father's Day cards. I read most of the verses on the cards and handwritten notes through tear-filled eyes. I read the love letters from my dad to my mom before they were married, and even some he had written after they married. I read every news clipping that Mom had lovingly and carefully cut out from the newspapers over the past 50 some years. So many cherished memories flooded my mind and soul as tears flooded down my cheeks. I just had to bring home all the cards that I had sent to Mom and Dad as keepsakes.

Some day, far down the road, my family will go through my things.....things that aren't worth anything to them, but they were to me. There'll be black bags in the garage to be thrown away, boxes to go to Goodwill, some things will be sold, and some of my cherished things I hope they will take home as keepsakes and in remembrance of me. My life.