✝️ When you are raised in a church that always warned about don’t listen to rock and roll, don’t go to dances, don’t play cards because the Joker signifies the Devil, don’t do this or that, and they’re constantly stepping on your toes for the smallest of things, well it’s no wonder I’m unsure of myself and still hobbling and writhing from the pain, shame and guilt they caused.
✝️ I never once heard the word “grace” spoken in all those churches my folks dragged me to. Every revival, whether it was Pentecostal, Baptist or this one particular Christian church, we were there. I heard everything from you could lose your salvation, to doing good works, to only baptism saves you.
✝️ I recall in my early teens of one church that really terrified me. Every service all these people would go to the altar and wail and cry. One lady in particular really scared me as she was the loudest. These poor misled people constantly asked for forgiveness of their sins. Can you imagine being told at a young age that if you so much as have one impure thought, listen to the Beatles or dance you’d lose your salvation? I was afraid to do anything for fear of going to hell. That’s all I ever heard—fire and brimstone and I never heard about the love my Heavenly Father had and has for me. None of those people crying at that altar every service had the assurance of their salvation, and neither did I.
✝️ We are marred by the falsehoods of those teachings. Believing that any infraction of God's laws and also those added by the church would send you straight to hell if you didn't confess, repent and repeat. Sad that no one could ever hope to be good enough to see Jesus. Romans 3:10 As it is written: “There is none righteous, no, not one;” I'm grateful I know the truth from God's Word.
✝️ For some unknown reason my folks had me get me baptized twice—one time in church in the baptismal and once at a lake. I never really understood why they had me get baptized in the first place, let alone do it twice.
✝️ As a young girl I was very shy. I remember going to my grandparent’s house and standing behind a chair and singing little songs. I even crawled under the bed when this one man would come to our house. I was also very sickly and missed a lot of school. Since I was already shy and backwards, I think being raised in churches like the ones I mentioned molded me, not everyone, into a frightened teenager that was dysfunctional and wary. I was always seeking approval. I was quiet, shy and afraid to even speak at times. I didn’t know how to speak up for myself. Like the old saying goes “Afraid of your shadow”. I was the poster child for that. In the dictionary by the word “fear” was my photograph. It’s no wonder I was constantly a target to be bullied, abused and left out of all the social activities all through school. That all started early on in my school years. I’d go to school and see all these invitations on other’s desks but my desk was always empty. I was never invited to one single birthday party all through school. To add insult to injury, I had cognition problems all through my school years. Sadly I was—and still can be—a target even through all my adult years. I was always a bride since I was married three times, but I was never a bridesmaid.
✝️ Imagine as a young child and teenager always looking over your shoulder, being scared to death that you were going to say or do something wrong. I never was taught to fear or know the love of God, I feared the wrath of those preachers in those churches and of my folks if I didn’t want to attend church that Sunday or Wednesday night. I even faked being sick at times.
✝️ When a child is never taught in church about the love of Jesus, in SOME, not ALL circumstances, that older teenager, and on into adulthood, will stray down a very dark path, looking for that love they’ve failed to receive. I know I did—and it ultimately led me down that path I’m certainly not proud of. To name a few it was full of misery, pain, shame, abuse, blame, grief, broken promises, many nights in lonely bars wanting just one true friend—and many times my heart was broken and scarred. My heart still bears many scars.
✝️ I could write so much more, but to protect the guilty, I’ll stop right here.
✝️ I didn’t know whether I was really saved for many, many decades later; it was actually just the last few months of my life that I have that assurance, and I’m 68 years old. I’m thankful for an online friend who showed me and many others the Truth and Light.
✝️ Thankfully I know now that my salvation is secure and that I can never lose it. My name is written in the Book of Life and God has no eraser. The Bible clearly tells you that the Holy Spirit is sealed. Now I know I am saved and that I’ll spend eternity with Jesus. I am a child of the King, and He loves me so very much. So much that He died on that cross as the propitiation for all of our sins, and He arose from that tomb the third day. Jesus is alive. Please repent—change your mind—and believe in Him today. Faith in Jesus Christ and His finished work on the cross equals eternal life!
✝️ Ephesians 1:13-14~”In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory.”
✝️ John 10:28-29~”And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand.”
✝️ John 3:15-18~”that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.”
✝️ 1 John 5:11-13~”And this is the testimony: that God has given us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life. These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, that you may know that you have eternal life, and that you may continue to believe in the name of the Son of God.”
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